Today I’m going to talk to you about how to handle fear. I’m going to talk from experience… I’m going to talk from experience with myself and with my clients.
More often than not, I think the first thing that needs to be acknowledged from working with fear is the fact that more often are not we would run away from it, we get scared, things get a little bit uncomfortable and we turn the other way and we try to not address that thing head on.
And I think, that’s the mistake. Fear needs to be attacked, it needs to be treated as something of substance that can have a profound effect on our lives. it’s certainly not something to be shrugged off.
Now, the very first thing is the fact that we need to take action in the awareness stage of that fear. So identify where exactly it’s coming from and saying, “Okay, well what can we do about that?”
For example, in my military career, there was many a time where fear became a factor and you get very nervous, you get very scared and everything is telling you not to do something and sometimes that is the key motivator as to why exactly you should do something,.
We know that fear itself in that moment will either cripple you or you can use it as a tool.
Ladies, whenever you’re in a gym facility, I get it, there’s guys around potentially throwing around weights, there’s maybe a lot women in there who they look like they know what they’re doing and they look in amazing shape. That then can make you feel as though you’re not in a position to be in the gym yet, and that is not the way to look at it.
It’s okay to have them feelings, but they need to be addressed head on and not allowed to dictate what you should or shouldn’t do.
Sometimes that’s in your head and it’s a mental state that we need to start to think about. A mental state itself is something that can become reinforced with time.
We can’t go from, for example, a civilian Sam Cleaver to being a paratrooper Sam Cleaver overnight. It takes exposure to that environment, it takes time working on that mental and physical robustness in order to become that person that Sam Cleaver wants to be.
That is my experience with dealing with fear in the military but also throughout my civilian life as well. There’s many of times when it comes to business, when it comes to working with clients, when it comes to committing myself to something wether that be an educational platform, maybe an educational course.
These things can create nervousness around them because you can start to think things like, “Is this going to be over my head? Am I going to be going into deep.” And that’s not the way to look at it.
You’ve got to reframe those thoughts, “Okay, what can I gain from this at the worst case scenario?” The worst case scenario often is that you’ve actually learned to work with it, not lose your shit, actually control your emotions and in many respects use fear as a tool rather than let it cripple you.
You lost nothing but gained experience of working with fear, meaning next time it becomes a whole lot easier. And that’s the worst case scenario.
That’s exactly what we need to do with fear, we need to treat it as a tool, treat it as a driving force behind everything we’re trying to achieve, and by doing that, we will instantly achieve more in life in the four pillars which you know we speak about. Which are health, business and careers, relationships and personal development.
All four pillars then will excel because you’re using more tools or more emotional driving force behind those pillars.
Fear, it’s a scary thing. Like I said, sometimes the only motivator is the fact that you have everything screaming at you, every single thing in your body, every emotion, every impulse, screaming at you not to do something and sometimes that’s exactly why you do it.
How many times would you have gone to a gym, ladies, let’s be honest, where you pull up to the gym, you can see there’s about 50 cars there, you know the gym’s going to be absolutely rammed and you’re thinking, “I’m not sure about this. I’m not sure about this.
I’m not sure if I want to go in there and actually do this”? And you, in that moment, have an option. You either turn around and call it a day, which is completely okay sometimes, or you say, “Fuck it, I’m going to do it. I’m going to go in there, I’m going to do my thing. I may look like a tit, but I will not allow this emotion and this impulse to tell me what the to do. I’m going to go and do what I need to do and what I feel as though I want to do.”
Because that impulse and that emotion is telling you not to.
Like I say, sometimes that’s the only driving force you have, but you’ve got to use it.
What I need you to do now is action this shit, don’t just listen to it, actually go out there and action it.
Don’t let fear of feeling like a tit or looking like a tit (because you probably don’t as people aren’t even paying attention) stop you.
You just need to go in there and do your thing and ignore them all.
Get in your little zone when you turn up to the gym today, do not turn around, do not allow yourself to do that, let that nervous impulse be the key force behind getting you in the gym to train.
“Action is the only answer”